Inside ACO's Poetic Mind
A Kid No More
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We've been together since high school. I was 14, she was 16 then. She was the one who taught me how to love. I knew how it is to be loved and to love because of her. Ah, Yna Mikaela. My one great love. My home.
 
As I key in the letters in my fone's SMS menu, I can't help smiling. I can't get enough of her. Depeche Mode's song keeps on running in my head, I let out a silly grin. She always makes me feel this way. I teased her with my message, almost daring her. And she gamely played along, challenged by my constant prodding.
 
"Can you keep up with me?" she asked. I teasingly answered, "That's for me to know and for you to find out."
 
And from then on, I knew everything will be different.

We agreed to meet up at a place where we could spend time alone, by ourselves. I arrived early at the terminal, glancing at my watch, it was only 6:30 in the morning. I am 30 minutes early. I let out a sigh. Can I really do this? I asked myself. I have been physically intimate with one girl in my entire lesbian life. Yna Mikaela  doesn't know that. And now, I am almost trembling at the thought of it all. What if I failed to please her? What if she laughs straight to my face? What would I do? A pat on my back jolted me back to reality. I stood in awe as she smiled at me and said, "Let's go?" I nodded, dumbfounded. God, she is beautiful.
 
The ride was refreshing, with all the scenery along the way, it helped me relax a bit. I was thinking of climbing the summit of the mountain. Can I sustain the hike? 
 
"Hey there poet, where are you?" I looked at her and smiled coyly, "Oh, I am sorry. I was lost in my thoughts." She touched me gently and said, "You're trembling." I felt stupid. I regained consciousness at once and said, "You're beautiful Yna." I watched her as she blushed, shaking her head, "No, look at me I am fat. I'm not the Yna you used to know way back in high school. But thanks, I am glad you think so." I reached for her hand, squeezed it lightly as I smiled at her. My voice lowered, "You are beautiful and I am going to make you believe that you are." My eyes looked straight in hers.
 
We got off the bus and walked hand in hand, straight to the reserved room. I took one look at her, smiled and winked without saying a word. After locking the door, my hands moves to her neck, gently massaging. I watched her close her eyes. I couldn't believe that I am with her. I have longed for her my entire life, resigned to the fact that I cannot have her. For she has already tied the knot. But here I am, with her. Alone. I run my fingers through her hair, moved closer as I inhaled her scent. I miss her so much, I still remember her scent. Her scent that I have always dreamed of, searched for, yet never found in another. She leans her head back while releasing a soft moan. That made me feel relieved. It encouraged me to continue. And I did.
 
Slowly, I gazed into her eyes, waiting for her move. That certain look gave herself away, and I gently kissed her. Parting her lips with my tongue. Teasing her with my feather like kisses, until she couldn't take it anymore. She pulled me back onto her, as our tongue fooled around. Finally, I allowed my fingers to run through the curves of her body. My eyes travel down her body, and saw the twin mountains that I wish to climb. Again, the question in my mind bothered me, "Can I do it? Can I sustain it?" Her nipples were erect, begging to be touched. I bit my lip and run my tongue over it. Anticipating the moment I take them with my parted lips. And willingly, I obliged.
 
Hours passed, my chest was still heaving as I rappeled down the mountains and swam the lovestream that flowed ever so openly. As I reached the shore, I let out a  contented sigh. Smiling, I threw myself at the waiting sand. Lying on my back, I can still taste the
waves of pleasure that swept me off my feet. Aaaahh..
 
I can still remember what Yna Mikaela whispered in my ear before she dozed off to sleep in my arms. "You're not a kid anymore. I don't see you as one after what you made me feel tonight."
 
I looked at her deep in her sleep smiling. Gently, I touched her and  said "I love you. Always have, always will." And then I closed my eyes, at long last, I'm a kid no more in her eyes.

 

Abigail Cruz Oliva